Temple of the Dark Moon

when u browse through volumes of books featuring artistic works of past artists be it famous or not, u will come across many many paintings, sculptures and what have you that their title would be "Untitled". i remember asking why would anyone create a work with no title to my then art class teacher. well, i cant remember what he said~ hahaah.. but i guess i can understand a little… its probably a work of art done with no particular motive in mind. and even should the completed work can be named, it is never the same. and thus it remained untitled. we put a title to things when we know what we want to acheive. what we want so show. what we want to write. but this is how it is… there is not particular message that i wish to pass, no particular story i wish to say, nothing in particular…. just thoughts flowing as i type… sentences may makes or not… that matters not.

kanashi na~ funny that books of astrology, new age have always pointed out that i possess the gift of clairvoyance. the ability to read the future events when in reality i’m blurest in my group. always needing someone to pass on announcements, dates, gossips or what have you. its fun to partly believe that you are a clairvoyant~ i guess that is why i always make future assumptions, trying to fulfill part of the prophecy that i have came across. come to think of it, my ‘predictions’ are never that of good news… afterall, common sense tells you good news are very hard to anticipate… and as such, im the predictor of bad news. AHAHAHAH. always telling others the misfortune that will befall them with current events~ wrong? i do not now. i always wish i was wrong. somehow, predictions of misfortune tend to make themselves come true. or perhaps we harp on misfortunes that it can be intepreted as so~

universal waite deck, goddess deck, sephiroth deck… my only 3 tarot decks… now lie in the shadows… i have not touched any of them for a while now. i was so enthusiastic to try out the theories of predicting the future. partly knowing it was a lie, partly hoping to see its powers come true. partly curiousity, partly skeptical, partly hopeful, partly fearful of its truth. in the end, fear of its predictability led to their storage. afterall, if life is fated, what use then am i trying so hard to live? its easy for others to laugh~ fate, there is no such thing. i would like to believe it too~

deja vu. we hear it all the time. from the time we heard for the first time from the move ‘The Matrix’, it has become a rather usual concept~. we try to find scientific prove that deja vu does not exist. others try to explain that its scatoma. we see what we wanted to see. but that is why deja vu is so scary. some a facinated by the experience. however, if u had a tad too much of it, facination quickly turns to fear. i have seen countless scenes replaying for the second time. i didnt see those scenes a day, or week before. they were months and months ago~ but they are etched so clearly in ur mind that when u see the scene again, u knew u had seen it before.

and if that is fate, then my choices were never choices to begin with. if things i do not know i will do i have already seen them, then what was i choosing? i was never choosing, i merely followed what was determined. however, should there be such a thing, then i guess this is what it means to be attributed with the gift of clairvoyance. i have seen the future however i do not know what to make do of it. 

future, something we always look forward to~ what do wa want for our future? how many of us thought of our future with images so clearly imprinted infront of our eyes? i cannot see any of it. lack of planning perhaps~ perhaps~